Every guy would like to settle down with a woman of his dreams. And it all starts with approaching a girl that appeals to you intending to make her your girlfriend, and later ask them for a hand in marriage. But things are not that simple.
Different guys have different traits. Some are courageous enough to approach any lady that pleases them, while others are bitterly shy to make any move. Others will come close to the lady and behave clumsily ending up embarrassing themselves big time. These guys might identify a woman they have feelings for but freeze when they get close to them. They just keep their feelings to themselves until another dude comes by and takes away a girl that would have been theirs.
Dating Tips for Shy Guys
If you belong to this category, there are some dating tips for shy guys that you should consider. Read on to find out how you can improve your situation.
Find Outgoing Friends
You should try to be around people who are louder and are more extroverted than you are. Such guys will help you to subconsciously relax and find ways to share your opinions during conversations. Besides, you will not have to do all the work when it comes to approaching women and initiating conversations.
Take an Interest in Her
Some guys usually think that talking to a woman is difficult. But this is not always the case. You just need to ask her genuine questions and take your time to listen to her response. Ever heard that women want a listening ear? Show her that you are genuinely interested in what she has to say. Sometimes, you do not have to talk a lot about yourself. Allow her to share who she is with you and encourage her to keep speaking with questions and interjections. Doing this makes her feel desirable, making her connect with you.
Change the Way you Perceive Rejection
Most guys fear being rejected by women out there – the reason they are shy. You should instead change the way you perceive rejection. Prepare for any response. She can like or reject you. She might not like you in the first place. However, you might be attractive to someone else. If you change the way you perceive rejection, you will be ready to reach out and any woman boldly.
Do What You Love
We’re all passionate about different things in life. Some guys like music, while others like football, among other things. Doing what you love will help boost your confidence instead of wallowing in low self-esteem. What this does is to bring you close to people that having likings lie yours – including ladies. Sooner or later, you’ll find some girl that sees you as the perfect match. Things just click in such situations.
Let Go the Past Experiences
You might have had a bad dating experience in the past. Don’t let these experiences take the better part of you. Your past does not define you. Be positive and ready to meet someone better out there. Believe that your dating life is about to get better. If you are positive, you are likely to draw positive experiences into your life.
Change the Outcome
Ideally, if you go on a date with a woman, you expect that she will give you a chance to date her later in life. However, this is not always the case. If she rejects you and refuses to give you her number. Be grateful for the fact that you got the opportunity to become better at talking with women. In such a case, if the woman doesn’t accept you, you will not feel bad as you will have achieved your goal to some extent. It is just a matter of time and the game will be all yours to win.
Try to Embrace Shyness
Being shy is not evil. It is not something that you should distance yourself from. As long as it does not have any negative effect on your life, you can still live with it. What matters is your humility. If you are humble and honest, you might attract a woman who loves you the way you are. You’ll be surprised to get a beautiful woman despite being a shy guy. Some women look for other desirable traits that can help build better relationships.
State Your Intentions
Most shy guys find it difficult to state their intentions when they are approaching a woman they are interested in. If you do not communicate your ends clearly, she might friend zone you. She will just keep you as a friend because you have not told her otherwise. If you are frank enough, trust that your relationship with move to the next level.
Don’t Be Too Available
You should learn how to detach. Learn not to be too available all the time. Otherwise, they’ll take you for granted. Ladies don’t want a man that lazies around in the name of coding. Choose to do what you like most when you are alone. Or get a hobby to keep yourself busy. Your girlfriend to be should know that sometimes you might be busy doing something constructive. This way, she respects you more and sees that you are serious in life.
Read Her Signals
Women will not just come to you and ask for your phone number. Although some do, few are that desperate. The good news is that some signals can show you that a certain woman likes you. She might suggestively look at you when you are at the bar or the supermarket. That avails an opportunity to make a move and the rest will be a breeze.
Get Into Dating Sites and Social Media
If you are shy, why not try to meet people who are readily available for dates? Many women are on dating sites ready to mingle and meet their future partners. It could be you. Also try your luck on Facebook, Twitter, and even Instagram. Compose a message and hope they’ll reply. When they do, leverage the opportunity and speak your mind through the keyboard. You might be lucky to find a receptive woman on these platforms than out there.
Take Baby Steps
You do have to become Mr. outgoing overnight. You will need time to achieve this goal. Start by pushing yourself to talk to 2 or more strangers every time that you go out. You can trust that you will be able to become outgoing after some time. You might experience anxiety within the first few days. However, you might eventually become a pro in the long run. Here, you will be able to approach the woman of your dreams without fear.
Once you decide that you want to approach a woman, you should not hesitate to do so. In fact, commit to making a move no matter how uncomfortable it makes you feel. Manage your tension and trust your gut. Any interactions can either go well or poorly. If you have a positive attitude, you will succeed.
Find the Fun Part in You
Most women like humorous men. You might be shy but that doesn’t mean you are not funny. Start a conversation with something funny and throw in a few jokes you’ve learned over time. Doing this will capture her interest in you. Girls generally like a guy who can make them laugh. And by you being a fun guy, you can win her heart despite being a shy guy.
Choose Your First Date Setting Wisely
You should seek out environments that you will be comfortable in. Choose to go to the movies or any particular loud venue where you don’t have to speak much. Avoid places that are too intimate at first as it could be awkward. As time goes by, change the settings the more you grow fond of each other and become intimate.
Get in the Moment
Being shy should not consume you to the core. Just like it would not prevent you to be sad, let it not hinder you from enjoying the moment. Take a breath and switch your focus onto her. Hold her hands if it allows. Lean into each other and even kiss her if the time is right. When it is time to play, do it with her.
Challenge Your Inner Thoughts
As a shy male, you might feel that you are not good enough. You should instead shun such thought away. You should instead be positive about yourself. Being shy does not necessarily make you a bad person. Challenge those negative feelings and do what they are telling you not to do.
Watch Videos and Practice
There are many videos that you are likely to find online that can help boost your confidence levels. Some experts have great recorded tutorials that will give you a hint on what you need to do. Practice what you see daily so that you can become a confident person in the long run.
Drink a Little
For shy guys, a bottle of booze will bolster your confidence levels. Maybe two bottles of your favorite beer are what you need to go for the girl of your dreams. Get a couple of drinks that you are comfortable with to give you the morale to seduce that girl. Ideally, you should go for something light that will bring the best out of you. Sometimes, take coffee to stimulate your mind.
Realize That Women are Just People
You might not be shy when talking to your mother or the woman operating the grocery store. But feel shy towards someone whom you are attracted to. That’s your mind playing games on you. All these women the same and when treated with respect, there is no reason to fear.
Build Relationships to Women You Aren’t Attracted to
If you want to be more confident in life, try to build relationships with women around you. Engage in conversations with them and even get comfortable joking with them. It will help you manage your relationships with your future girlfriend.
Chose a Date Based on Shared Interests
It is easy to spark conversations when you have common ground. Therefore, the places you choose needs to appeal to both of you. Go painting together, walk down the streets, watch a football game, and many more activities. It’s easier for your partner to open up in settings they are comfortable to be.
You should know the vital details about yourself before you start building relationships. Start asking questions about what you like and what kind of a woman you need. What are the things that you are comfortable with? What are your limits?
Stop Comparing Yourself With Others
Once you start comparing yourself with others, you are likely to become discouraged. Your friends might be more popular than you. They can speak better than you. They dress better…You name it. Instead, focus on being happy about yourself and appreciating what you have. This way, others will appreciate it too.
Go Out Often
Some guys like to stay indoors. Initially, it might seem like a good idea, but it could paralyze your social skills. As much as you might be a shy guy, you should try to go out more often and meet new people. You can make new friends and eventually you will get a partner who suits you.
Improve Your Body Language
Look yourself in the mirror. Do you look approachable? You should try to smile and look positive. You can try to adjust your posture to look more confident in public. You should also try to make eye contact with the person whom you are talking to. Your facial expressions will make your partner know whether you are confident or not. Learn ways to improve your body posture to become approachable.
Fake It Till You Make It
Most shy guys usually lack confidence when it comes to expressing themselves around women. In this case, if you want to increase your self-esteem, try to fake confidence to help you overcome anxiety.
Choose Active Dates
Most shy guys usually dread having conversations with girls. If talking is your problem, try going on an active date. On a physical date, the activity can do the talking for you.
You want to be groomed and well-dressed when you approach a girl. That way, you’ll have more confidence in yourself instead of being self-conscious all the time. Besides, you don’t want a girl to smell a weird odor from you when they are just starting to know you. You should also make sure you’re shaved well and feeling nice and fresh.
Hire a Dating Coach
A dating coach is professional that will offer you advice that is tailormade to suit your needs and goals when it comes to dating. It will cost some money, but it worth it. They don’t just identify your mistakes but offer you actionable solutions for better performance when you approach a woman.
Being shy is normal. If you are a shy guy, the above-mentioned dating tips for shy guys will help you through dating. Being shy should not hinder you from getting a partner. Most shy guys have succeeded in getting lifetime partners, and so can you. Consider these ideas and you will not be frustrated anymore.